Being “exclusive” means MONOGAMOUS and snapstreaks do not mean having a conversation. I could go on, but I will tell you this. You are without a doubt the worst person I know.

– The girl who got hotter without you by my side

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Our relationship began this summer. By the end, it was a big bummer. We laughed and smiled at the start. But then being with you did not feel so smart. We got to the middle. It lasted so little. Because then came the end. Where I dumped you. Hello friend.

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You weren’t even that hot…

– Your Ex

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Dear Ex,

Let me begin this letter to you by saying that I do not regret breaking up with you one bit. The summer we spent together was great, but once school began, it all went downhill. I don’t know what it was that brought us together in the first place. Well actually I do. It was snapchat. How romantic! Our relationship could not have begun in a more stereotypical millennial social media type of way.

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There are few things I want to talk to you about, but of course you’ll cancel because you were “caught up” with your boys, or you’ll ghost me for a day or two because you were with some other girl the previous night.

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I’m sorry for your next girlfriend. Sorry not sorry.

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Want to know another thing that I really loved hearing? “When we hang out, it’s boring.”

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Everyone says that you learn and become stronger from a breakup but honestly, this is the only time I can say that I want to go back in time and wish I never stood next to you at that one party the first time I met you.

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Dear My Biggest Mistake.

I find it funny how you think this is all a joke now and other guys

commend you for it even though you really hurt me. I’m glad you got a “cool” story to tell at the expense of losing someone who cared about you. However, I ended up getting the last laugh as your girlfriend was hooking up with someone else and you became the joke of the school. So in the end I won.

I wish you the worst.